I rarely make my content extremely personal over social media but today I felt a personal pull to write about something that I have been reflecting on for awhile.
In the past couple of years I have learn the value of communicating, patience and understanding towards myself and others.
I had gone through a very hard life lesson experience with someone a while ago which in turn made me emotionally tough and made me more rigid in meeting new people. I prefer not to go into details because I am not that kind of person.
However I realize that there is two kinds of personalities those who want to break a pattern of hurt, wanting to make peace to there pasts to make a fruitful future and those who prefer to be stuck in their past constantly blaming it.
I knew someone like that, I tried being there friend because I cared for that person, I loved that person and I felt like I connected with that person. I took a backseat many many times because I felt like this person has been through so much emotionally and I wanted to be there and thought that was ok. This person took me for granted a lot when I did spend time with them. I realized that this person did not want to be emotionally attached to anyone because of the hurt from their past they never healed from it because I always felt like they preferred not to.
After a falling out with this person I reached out to this person and they said that they never had a problem with me. However various times when I did try to talk to this person I always got run around conversations or excuses. They seem to be too self-involved with there own goals and past hurt and not letting that go. Goals are nice don’t get me wrong, I have no doubt in my mind that everyone wants to better themselves, get paid more, getting an education, etc. However those are things you can’t hug at night or be there for you. The most memorable experiences I had are with people and with things.
The more I reach out in the past couple of months I got little in return the more I realized that in the end it was not worth reaching out to this person. The friendship I cared so much about with this person wasn’t even on there radar. You have to be kind to yourself and be around and talk to people that genuinely want to talk to you and vice versa. You make time for what is important to you.
As hard as it is for me to let go of this person I had to. If someone is not willing to make the time to talk or constantly make up excuses to avoid conversations with you then not worth it.
I am not a mean spirited person at all, I do wish this person the best in succeeding in their goals. I just hope they don’t take anyone for granted along the way.
thanks for reading this.